Learning Away  

It was senior night at one of the last home basketball games of the season at Simsbury High School. Just before tipoff, Emmanuel, one of the team’s captains, stepped onto center court amidst the roaring applause of his family, friends, teachers, and teammates.    

The team didn’t come away with a victory that night, but for Emmanuel, it was another step in a remarkable journey. At 13, he left his home in the Bronx to live at the Simsbury A Better Chance (ABC) House and attend Simsbury High School in Simsbury, Connecticut, a quintessential New England town that is predominantly white and affluent.

A Better Chance is a national program promising middle and high students, both boys and girls, from historically underserved communities the opportunity to attend high-performing independent day schools, boarding schools, or community school programs (C.S.P.) throughout the country. Its mission is to give deserving students access to high-quality transformative educational opportunities that support them in reaching their full potential and substantially increase the number of well-educated young people of color prepared to assume positions of responsibility and leadership in American society.

Founded in 1973, the Simsbury ABC program is a C.S.P. for boys and is known by the stately brick colonial located at the center of town, called the ABC House. The boys live there five to eight at a time with resident directors and a resident advisor. The resident advisor runs daily study hours to help the scholars complete their class homework/projects and prepare for tests. Additional academic advisors assigned to each scholar provide guidance on courses, extracurricular activities, or volunteer passion projects over their four years at Simsbury ABC. Each scholar is also matched with a Simsbury host family with a son in his same class and with whom he spends one weekend a month. 

At Simsbury ABC, the scholars experience far more than a chance to attend a better school with a stronger path to college. What they learn navigating high school away from home, and immersing themselves in a community vastly different from their own, prepares them for success in life as well as school. Indeed, the resilience and persistence these scholars exhibit make them excellent candidates for colleges and universities hoping their students will thrive.  

A House and a Home 

Sheri Eklund and her husband Jae have been the ABC House resident directors for the last four years. They live in an apartment connected to the main house, though they spend most of their time with the boys, getting them on the bus, driving them to sports, and eating dinner with them every night at 5:30 p.m. On a typical night, the boys line up at the buffet, pile their plates with the home-cooked meal the ABC House chef has prepared for them, and assemble around the oversized dining room table. 

As Eklund described: “It is that one time of day between after-school activities and before mandatory study hours when everyone is together.”

Eklund, who is a pediatric nurse practitioner by training, is both pragmatic and warm. Her affection for, and protection of, the boys in her care, is evident. In talking about them to others, she leads with their strengths and their hopes and says even she is not fully aware of the challenges they may have faced in their young lives. As resident director, she is both parental figure and advocate, whether getting resources together for a boy to pursue a particular sport or hobby or meeting with the high school principal about any issues of concern. 

Her approach to supporting the scholars is, not surprisingly, straightforward. “These guys should have every opportunity to do what they want to, just like every other student in this town,” she said. 

On one particular Tuesday, over their “make-their-own” quesadillas, the boys talked about how it is they came to live at the ABC House. Of the current scholars, Emmanuel, Isaias, and Julian are from New York City; David is from Maryland, and Joakim is from nearby Hartford. They all said they are in Simsbury because adults in their lives envisioned a different educational path for them. It is hard to believe their belief in themselves didn’t also contribute, but for now, they are happy to talk about others who are responsible for their participation.    

Emmanuel’s mother insisted he not go to the high school all of his friends were planning to attend in the Bronx. David, a junior, had a similar story: His dad had found the program years earlier for his older sister and encouraged him to leave Baltimore for his high school years so he might get into a good college, as she had.  

Isaias, a freshman who has only been at the House a few months, left New York City for Simsbury after only two years in the country. Having come with his family from the Dominican Republic, he had been performing well in bilingual classes (Spanish and English) when his teacher encouraged him to take a monolingual track (English only) for eighth grade. When Isais continued to do well, she suggested he apply to the ABC program, a decision his family strongly supported.  

Later, Eklund explained that the boys come to the program for a variety of reasons, starting with the program’s premise — to get a higher quality education. But, having gotten to know their families, Eklund said it’s about more than just escaping something that doesn’t work.  

“Most of the families are first-generation immigrants, many directly from Africa, and they have a culture where there is an expectation that they will send their children somewhere where they will do their best. It’s very different from what we often think of here, which is, ‘Oh, I could never send my kid away.’”  

While the boys no doubt appreciate the good intention, they are honest about how difficult it was at first to leave their neighborhoods. Isaias is still adjusting to a new school and being away from his friends who played pick-up soccer and welcomed him into their community when he arrived in the country. Starting again is hard, but the other boys in the house are supportive, knowing full well how he feels. He recently joined a soccer club, which the Eklunds arranged for him with funds from the program. 

Sports is a common channel for belonging for any teenager, particularly for the ABC scholars. “Freshman year, I didn’t play a sport, so I didn’t really have anything to talk to anyone about but school,” said David, who now fences and rows crew. “But when I started playing sports, I started making more connections, and it all made more sense to me.” 

For Emmanuel, the combination of leaving his friends behind and worrying about making new ones was initially tough. “I was in the Bronx my whole life, and my friends and I, we were going to stick with each other, and then I was the one going away. When I got here and went to my first day of school, I saw only three or four people that looked like me.” 

Emmanuel said it’s now hard to imagine those days, as he prepares to graduate with what he called “some of the best friends of my life.”  

“I think if you put yourself out there, you’ll find you have more in common with people than you think,” he said. “I have great friends. I don’t have a really big circle like some people do, but I think having a small circle of really good friends is better.” 

David, too, has found his footing. He sees his time at Simsbury High School as a series of learning experiences, all leading to knowing who he is as a person. “All I knew was what life was like for the first 14 years of my life in Baltimore, and then when I saw how people acted here, my first instinct was to be more like everyone else. But when you do that, it becomes really apparent how different that is from who you really are.”   

The level of maturity the boys exhibit is the first clue to the impact their experience at the ABC House is having on them. With a fair amount of independence (like doing their own laundry and walking down the street for Chinees food), they are held accountable not just for their behavior and their grades but for how they contribute to a household of different people with a healthy number of rules.  

“Sometimes, I’ll think, ‘Oh no, I can’t get along with this guy,’” Emmanuel said. “And then it all works out.” 

“Yeah,” David added. “We all come from different backgrounds and have different personalities, but we definitely get along. We just have to solve stuff.” 

While it may be challenging at times, the boys in the ABC House regularly form a strong bond and a common commitment to who they are as ABC scholars. “If I had to come up with one way to describe them, I’d say they are like brothers,” said Kara Petras, a Spanish teacher at Simsbury High School and a board member at the ABC House. “They are a nuclear unit, but they are always folding in new kids and including the other boys in these new friendships.” 

Petras has had several ABC scholars in her class and, as a long-time volunteer at the program, gotten to know many of the boys over the years.  

“I’m like their mom at school,” she said. “We’ll start a group text at the end of the day for anyone needing a ride home.”  

Petras first learned about the ABC Program when she was in high school in Massachusetts and made friends with some of the girls who participated. Getting to know other people her age of a different culture had a major influence on her. She believes the same is true of how the ABC scholars contribute at Simsbury High School.  

“They carry with them the reputation of the ABC House in how they behave, and I think that rubs off on people,” she said. “They take their classes seriously. With their work ethic, their attention to detail, and their willingness to stay after school, you can tell they have a lot more skin in the game than a regular high school student. They are the kind of students you want your own kids to be.” 

It’s accolades like these that Eklund draws on to lift her spirits whenever she hears comments that reveal a lingering bias.

“When I tell people what I do, I get a lot of, ‘Oh, that must be really hard.’ People will ask me, ‘How do they do in school?’ or ‘Do you have to deal with a lot of behavior problems?’ I just tell them these kids are here for a reason. They’re great students; they do well in school.” 

The current residents of the ABC House said they find Simsbury to be a welcoming town, if different than what they are used to. And it is clear that those who run the program are all acutely aware of the need for the boys to feel they belong in order to do well. The host family model has resulted in life-long mentors and friendships. And in a classic it-takes-a-village approach, there is a strong circle of support that includes school counselors, coaches, teachers, and volunteers — all with eyes on the boys as they live, learn, and grow.

Hopes and Dreams 

On a Sunday afternoon in the ABC House living room, the boys talked excitedly about college and what they will do afterward. Isaias has his sights on N.Y.U., having heard they have an excellent transportation program, a combination of mechanics and engineering. David is also interested in mechanical engineering, in part because he has always been good at math. Emmanual dreams of being in sports marketing but will major in business generally as to not limit his choices. He is just now deciding which of the accepted colleges he will attend. No doubt his love of basketball will follow.   

True to its goal, the ABC House boasts alumni who are an impressive array of professionals and graduates, with more than 95 percent of participants going on to college. At the ABC House in Simsbury, alumni regularly return and are on a quarterly Zoom call where they mentor the boys on academics, college prep, or just life at Simsbury High. Seeing themselves in these professionals gives the current scholars the inspiration to pursue the road they are on and to appreciate what it might be teaching them, even if they don’t always realize it.  

“We hear all the time from the guys before us that even though we go to the same school as all the other kids, living in this house gives us a big leg up on college,” David said. 

With end of year approaching, the ABC scholars and alumni will be taking another step in their journey. The current residents will be heading home for work, summer courses, or preparing to leave for college. Some of the boys who came before them will be graduating from college; others are out of school and will keep in touch as mentors. Their individual success is the ultimate goal of the support team that has watched them grow in remarkable ways.  

Asked what she appreciates most about her experience at the ABC House, Eklund said, “The human spirit of all of it: meeting the families, making our mission work — not just with education but with everything — and seeing them grow and following them through and letting them know, ‘You guys are going to be successful. You are going to be great leaders in your communities.’”

You can reach LearningWell Editor Marjorie Malpiede at mmalpiede@learningwellmag.org with comments, ideas, or tips.